Celebratory Photos

I took some new photos in celebration of one year of no cutting. I know that seems weird, to say I celebrated by taking self-portraits, but let me see if I can try to explain...

A lot of people don't get why I take so many self-portraits. Or, perhaps it's better to say, they come to their own (erroneous) conclusions about why I do it. Conclusions like, "She just thinks she's sooo pretty and wants to look at herself all day long." Um, no, not true. Or this one: "She always takes pictures of herself because it's the only way she can make sure she always looks good." Also not true, because I don't necessarily think it makes me "always" look good (however, the added control does ensure that I feel like I look better than I might otherwise, let's be honest).

The self-portraits, for me, allow me to explore how I'm feeling and what I'm thinking and try to emote that in a way that can be captured on film. Sometimes I actually surprise myself, because in looking at the pictures later I'll realize how I felt better than I did when I was taking the pics. I see myself differently when I see myself in the photos, and I don't just mean physically. I see parts of my personality that I don't usually recognize - strengths and weaknesses and everything in between. They're there, in the pictures, in ways I wouldn't realize without them.

Self-portraiture is, for me, a sort of self-discovery. That's why I take so many pictures of myself.

So on the occasion of this anniversary, I wanted to take some pictures in the hopes that I might capture how much I've healed. And, in my humble opinion, I do believe I did just that.














[Note: Yes, I have all of these in color as well, but I'm really fond of the black-and-white shots for this particular shoot.]

Comments

dancing dragon said…
Beautiful. I like that you post a lot of self-portraits. As a blog reader, it allows me to see beyond the words of the blog how you're feeling and parts of your personality, like you said.
Lara said…
dancing dragon - and i imagine for you, in particular, you see very different parts of my personality from what you used to see when we interacted at weekly rehearsals. :-P
Dee said…
You are beautiful and you deserve to celebrate such an accomplishment. I love your self-portraits. I love seeing the person behind the words and you express yourself so well in photos.
tali said…
Wow - these are awesome portraits. The change from a year ago is striking and wonderful. Congrats on the anniversary :)
mks said…
These are awesome photos - I love the 6th one down especially.
mr. franz the mouse said…
Well, I just think you're sooo pretty and I want to look at you all day long.
m. crumbs, esteemed photo critic said…
Beautiful portraits. Well composed. Fantastic what you did with your nose. Seriously. Your nose. Super awesome.

I see you changed your photo signature.
Mitchypoo said…
I just found your blog. I love your photos and I'm glad you find something good in self-portraiture. It doesn't matter what "they" think. Congrats on your 1 yr. Anniversary! That's a big one in my opinion.
hanlie said…
I agree with all the previous comments! We love seeing you, and we get to know you just as much through your pictures than through you words. You are so generous with yourself, and that is healthy. YOU are healthy! And we are attracted to you because of that. I so admire you.
Graham said…
Second from last is my favorite. Congrats on the anniversary!
Lara,
Glad you're doing a lot better.

I always have a difficult time photographing myself. You seem to do well at it. You definitely got some good ones once again.
LaLa said…
Second from the last is my favourite too.

Happy 12 months Lara, I am so very, very proud of you

xxx
Yuriko said…
I love your photos! Don't ever change! :)
Very good explanation...I'm surprised to see how many faces you can show us...by yourself....it's the photograph works to make the expression changes....and you do it by yourself....great !!!

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